a renewed love affair...

I have fallen in love again with... Pinterest.

It had been months. months- since I had opened my pinterest account and scrolled through the pins of DIY and recipes.

So there I am sitting in my PSYCH 301 class. Statistics for Psychology. The class they wouldn't let me waive because it was specific for psychology, and even though I had already taken general stats and stats for marriage and family, it was a no go. Bored as can be. (we were learning about the mean, median, and mode... i learned that in 3RD GRADE!!! 2 hours of which number is there the most of.... i was going crazy) So i pulled out my new smartphone. yes, i have a smart phone. and started looking at apps. free apps. in a spur of the moment I downloaded the pinterest app. Life changed.

One class period later. and 75,000 pins later. I had my future house planned, and enough craft ideas to last me a life time.

Now and honest moment. I have never done anything with any of the things i have pinned- they are always a "one day I will" type thing. until tonight.

I came across the idea while trying to stay awake in class. A date jar. for the night you cant think of what to do you choose something from the jar. it just so happened that a friend's wedding is tomorrow and I was sans gift. this was it.

so one quick run to hobby lobby later. i had a mason jar. paint. craft sticks. and ribbon. ALL SET.

then it was off to my night class. 2.5 hours of marriage therapyness. the only reason i dont go crazy in that class is because our teacher is literally crazy- and so funny. the time somehow goes quickly even though we dont learn very much. so I multitasked. while he repeated himself for the 13th time, i created a list of date ideas.

After class my visiting teacher's came over. having been home for only 10 minutes the whole day and being on a time crunch, they helped me paint the sticks while we talked about life and got to know each other. it was perfect.

I love crafts. truth.

here is the finished product. simple. easy. thoughtful.

the woman who i got the idea from used the different colors of popsicle sticks as different categories. (one's that cost money, that take planning, etc) I didn't want to- so it is just to make it look prettier.

Making the list of date ideas was fun. It was fun to relive dates as I wrote the idea down, or remember times sitting on the couch brainstorming with the boy I was dating a "bucket list" of dates we wanted to go on.

Here is the list I came up with.

1. go ice skating
2. go to the library and read your favorite children's books
3. visit temple square
4. watercolor the sunset
5. invite a couple over for games
6. invite a couple over for dessert
7. get dressed up and go out for a "classy" dinner
8. go for a hike/snowshoeing and carve your initials in a tree
9. look up what is going on in the community and go
10. go to a movie- his choice
11. go to a movie- her choice
12. make italian food and watch the movie "Life is Beautiful"
13. go rock climbing
14. go to a local arcade
15. play catch at the park
16. go star gazing
17. go window shopping for things for your home
18. build a fort and tell ghost stories
19. feed the ducks at the pond
20. make something for your house off pinterest
21. go roller blading
22. play at a park
23. go on a picnic
24. look through old pictures and tell stories
25. go geo cashing
26. go camping
27. go to the mall and pick out outfits for each other
28. go bowling
29. go mini golfing
30. make crayon art
31. finger paint
32. go for a bike ride
33. watch a disney movie while coloring in a coloring book
34. stay home and watch a movie- his choice
35. stay home and watch a movie- her choice
36. play hopscotch, color with sidewalk chalk, and hoola hoop
37. visit a retirement home and talk with the residents
38. go to the food bank and volunteer
39. go see a show/play
40. spend the night in the city (hotel)
41. go to a bed and breakfast
42. go canoeing/paddle boating
43. visit "your" spots
44. relive your first date
45. do facials
46. grab a friend and have a photo shoot
47. go shooting
48. plan your dream vacation
49. go to a museum
50. go to a concert
51. invite people over for minute to win it games
52. cuddle up on a couch and read a novel out loud
53. drive up a canyon and soak in the beauty
54. build a fire and make s'mores
55. make cookies and deliver them to friends
56. go to a sporting event
57. write "your story" together
58. look at wedding pictures and talk about the day
59. go out to dinner on "main street" and walk around
60. go out for ice cream
61. make homemade ice cream
62. put a puzzle together and drink hot chocolate
63. create a couple bucket list
64. go to the temple
65. project an old western on the wall and "shoot" the bad guys with nerf guns
66. have a nerf gun fight
67. carve soap
68. make sailboats with stuff around the house and race them
69. invite friends over and have a murder mystery party
70. find someone to serve
71. go for a run with your cameras and photography the world
72. make a volcano with baking soda and vinegar
73. test the mentos and soda myth
74. invite friends over for a murder mystery party
75. go to a fair
76. plan a road trip and actually go
77. go to cascade springs (in utah)
78. go out to dinner- her choice
79. go out to dinner- his choice
80. go golfing
81. go go-carting
82. go to the DI and get ridiculous outfits
83. go to the dollar store. spend $5 and just play with what you got
84. go dancing in the moonlight

Its the holiday season.

1. carve pumpkins and roast the seeds
2. go to a haunted house
3. go to a corn maze
4. write letters to santa
5. make "thankful' turkeys
6. write thank you notes to your parents (thanksgiving)
7. dye eggs
8. make a snowman
9. go sledding/ snowboarding/ skiing
10. cut out paper snowflakes while watching a christmas movie

If you have any ideas to add to this not comprehensive list...comment. share the knowledge.

also i have a renewed love affair for this song...

Does he have a seeing eye dog?

Dear time,
Please slow down. You are going too quickly.
Sincerely,
Ellie

I feel like my life is flying by in the blink of an eye. I felt like just yesterday was Monday and it is already Friday. Where is the time going? Have you noticed in your life that when things are going well time goes faster but as trials come (or you are in a boring class) time seems to stop. Why is that?

Today was another grand day. With my few extra minutes in the day I ran over to Matt and Keri's to help Keri while she tiled. I am proud to say I learned how to back butter. Sounds intense, right? All you do is spread the tiling gook (or adhesive) on the back of the tile. Keri was a speedy mcspeederson doing it and I was as slow as a turtle being terrified I would mess something up. Soon Ethan woke up and my efforts were quickly turned to making sure he didn't destroy the house. However, the little munchkin is perfect (well almost) and sat on the carpet outside the bathroom just holding the next tile keri would need in his lap (which was the size of him) and then trying his very hardest to hand it to her. Ethan's help didn't stop there- he ran with me to Lowe's to pick up some more tile adhesive for Keri. Embarrassing moment time. We were at Lowes, Ethan chillin in the cart, me pushing the cart having no clue where to find said material. I asked a nice looking worker dude for help finding it- he quickly led the way and life was grand. We found it and he asked if I needed help. It wasn't a huge bag so I politely said, "I think i've got it." After all I have been going to the gym. I was wrong. It might have been small but oh brother was it dense. I went to pick it up and immediately dropped in because of the other things in my hand. I set the things down and then struggled to get the bag into the cart. Moral of the story. accept service.

So my moral/character thought of the day. Keri gave me her credit card to buy the adhesive. As I went to check out I felt like such a little sneak, after all my name was not keri. It was under 25 dollars so I didn't have to sign anything but he asked for a phone number. I felt awkward as I got out my phone to give him Keri's number. But it made me think of when parent's call in pretending to be their son/daughter to get information. Am I holding a double standard? I get super frustrate with these parents who are lying in order to get information, when a lot of times their child has asked them to call. Keri had asked me to use her credit card, but does that change the fact that I was not keri? As I've thought about it I keep making the excuses- It just made life easier, it is like she had given me cash, I was helping her out. But aren't those the same excuses the parent's calling in would say? Hmph.

After our adventure to Lowe's I rushed home to get ready for a blind date. One of the many joys of single-hood. It was perfect weather outside and having the wind blow through our apartment made life near perfect. What made it perfect was a friend coming over and catching up which I got ready. I would quickly finish doing my hair, or getting changed, and then we would just sit and talk- or go and look out over the balcony. I am in love with spring time and our balcony. It is one thing I will miss next year at the duplex.

The date was great. Dinner and frozen yogurt, a classic first date. But I was amazed at the lack of blind date stereotypeness. I have come to the point in my life where I am fine with blind dates. I take them as a grain of salt. It is an opportunity to meet someone new, have fun, and if you don't have fun you never have to see them again. Two things I have learned to avoid. Blind dates right after a serious relationship (they will never compare, and they dont really care about you), and getting set up by your single friends (why aren't they dating them if they are so great?). I am always shocked at the number of people who end up getting married off of a blind date. Meet Becca and Jeff. They were set up by two non-member friends. It is amazing to me. This could be because most blind dates feel like an interview. Where are you from? What is your major? How many kids are in your family? I think that is what made this blind date refreshing. It was not an interview. Good work.

The night ended with the typical doorstep scene. oh wait. not typical. I had forgotten my keys. Luckily a party was going on in the ward, so I walked him back to his car on my way to the party. No worries, my roommate was home, i just didn't think to knock. And my other roommate had left a key for me under the mat, however, I didn't check my phone while on the date.

The night ended talking about the mysteries of love and dating with a friend in the ward as we watched hitch. We talked about our "types." His came down to four things. I feel like it is impossible to make a list of your type- after all we are single because we haven't found them yet. There are the essentials- a strong testimony, loving, etc, but a lot of the rest are preferences. Does it really matter if he is tall or short? Dark hair or blonde? I have found my "list" has come from dating experience- you learn what you like and what you dont like...that is the point of dating after all. Becca once put it perfectly when she put it "Marriage is deciding if you can live with the bad." No one is going to be perfect, after all we are all human. But can you handle the things they are missing? Are the deal breakers?

Anyways enough of my rant on dating. the end.

Saturday in the Park, I think it was the... 24th of March

I grew up listening to the band Chicago. I loved belting along as loud as i could- "if you see me walking by and the tears are in my eyes, look away baby look away" I think I did a pretty good rendition. Im sure part of my love of the band was attributed to the fact that I grew up in Chicago. The song of theirs that runs through my head on a semi-regular basis is Saturday in the Park. Especially if it is Saturday and I go to a park (makes sense.)

enjoy.

Last night I had fallen asleep on our big couch upstairs. I love those couches...lots. We have found that our loft gets a perfect breeze if you open up both of the windows, meaning I could cuddle up with blankets and not get hot. perfection. what was weird was that I woke up cuddled up with blankets on the small couch. I have no recollection of switching couches. My list of things I do in my sleep in getting quite long now. Sleep talking, sleep diving, and now sleep walking. Oh brother.

The afternoon was filled with "Love's Labors Lost," BYU's production of a Shakespearean Comedy. It was perfect. The play was set during WWII, and was full of energy. I LOVED it. They mixed some swing in which made my life happy- and made me miss Bill. During intermission they invited people to come on stage and dance to the live band. We sat and talked, but I couldnt help remember my Senior year of high school when we had gone to the Swingsingers show. They sang "Unforgettable" and invited everyone up to dance. No one moved. My dad grabbed my hand and we went up. We danced- and it was perfect.

family dance party at Becca's wedding.

dancing with the old man. it might be what I look forward to most at my own someday wedding.

It's funny how it is something so small but means the world to me. I was dating a guy a little while back and we went to a wedding reception where there was dancing. We didn't dance. That night we talked- I realized the things I would have to give up if we got married. Growing up dancing in the kitchen with my dad, and dancing with another boy I dated has made that something I look for. It was hard for me to think that I we were to get married that wouldn't be a part of our life. We talked, and he was perfect and said that it wasn't something I would have to give up- that he would dance with me.  As I was sitting there, on a date, I couldn't help but think about what I value in dating. What are the important characteristics? Do I NEED someone who will dance with me while cleaning up from dinner, or just someone who loves me? I think there are thing that are critical but other things that are just preferences- the really questions is how picky can you be, and what constitutes settling.

Tangent over. the play was great though. Full of comical moments. good times.

The rest of the night was planned to be spent at the Real Salt Lake Game with our Pass of all Passes, but plans changed. We decided we just wanted a relaxing night in Provo full of frozen yogurt, food from the hospital (a foot long corndog is only $1.75... amazing!), and a bike ride- followed of course with a movie and hot chocolate. Did the night go according to plan? no sir.

i cleaned and talked to the lovely becca, then we found out we had two free ice cream opportunities so scratch fro yo. then it was off to the hospital for din din but i was still stuffed from dateness. so al got food and it was off to a park. the best park in provo. it has a river with a bridge (perfect for pooh sticks) and a playground with swing, and pavilions, and a forest with trails, AND a pond with ducks! perfection.

look at that corndog... so so soooooo good.

i am so excited for spring/summer 

squeeze drinks...soo good.

Alison's lotion exploded in her purse. no bueno seniorita.

the night was finished off with a birthday party. make that two birthday parties. and then getting served Ice Cream because the boys thought we had General Relief Society Meeting. we didnt- but they still gave us ice cream. by this time we were feeling sickly full of sugar so it was home to watch Madagascar 2.

while things didn't go as planned it was a perfect, relaxing night.

STDEV 214R

Meet my newest night class. 

Night classes might be one of the worst things ever. Especially on days that you have no class. At the time that everyone is getting home from school you are heading out. "Why do I do this to myself?" Is a constant question as I make the trek back up to campus.

As awful as night classes are in theory, this night class is actually a heaven send. It is an integrity and character building class. I figured that I needed all the help I can get... well and it sounded amazing and was a one credit class, and I was in need of one more credit.

The class is full of controversy and discussion. Thoughts. Perplexing situations. and spending time with old friends. The beautiful Jackie Clark and the wonderful Spencer Schmutz are in my class. Both amazing people. I have found that much of what we are learning in that class parallels with what we have learned in my SFL 480 class (moral foundations of family life...take it!!!)

Well folks- I have some good news. (and by folks I mean, cathy  cate aka mom) We have a project for the class. We had three options. I chose the blog option.

You'll keep a daily journal of your observations of the day regarding integrity, honor, and character. Consider your own actions and those of others, and try to make small changes in your choices; show your growth through your journaling.  You will submit the journal (with 35 entries) and a 2-page reflection.  Your blogs must be original work, and not copied and pasted from other assignments.  You can also do just one entry per day; the intention is that this will take place over time.

So my musings on integrity, honor, and character will be here. I figure it is a perfect way to force me to blog/journal more and complete an assignment all at once.

so here i go.... day one.

have you ever thought about what all goes in to you making a decision. i am awful at making decisions. AWFUL. movie night with hot chocolate has become a common occurrence in our apartment- and I always make Alison decide. I hate dates where they make you decide what you want to do (that should be added to the list of dating advice). I always have so many conflicting thoughts going on in my mind that coming to a conclusion seems impossible. (I would like to point out that I DO make decisions, I just dont like unnecessary ones). well today in class we learned about the thought process that goes into making a decision.

i will enlighten you.

it all starts with the question. that this you are trying to solve. but dont forget there is purpose behind all decisions you are trying to make. a deeper purpose that you might share with people. 

we then have some influencing characteristics... this would include your point of view. these are external (well kind of internal) characteristics that affect your decision. example. gender, religion, profession, age, point in time, etc... we also have information. This is all you know about the decision you are making. Or the facts you are going off. But warning: you dont always have accurate or trustworthy information. sneaky information.

we next infer something about the situation based on the information we have. which leads to an assumption. and those assumptions have certain implications. now dont forget the underlying concepts we have during all of this. concepts= how we define certain things that impact our thought process.

is your head spinning yet?

simplified. 1. question. 2. purpose. 3. Point of View. 4. Information. 5. Inferences. 6. Assumptions. 7. Implications. 8. Concepts.

and there you have it. you have just experienced the elements of thought without ever realizing you thought them.

okay so now a personal experience to try to drive it home.

background. dated boy. ended things with boy. stayed in contact with boy. as bill and cate say "Ellie, you dont know how to break up with a boy." kind of true. well i am proud to say I am finally trying to break my vicious cycle and move on... now how did we get to this decision. 

*names have been change to protect privacy. ooo thats just fun to say. we will call said boy "Joe Bob" heheh. 

P.S. I apologize to the third party if you are reading this. This is purely focusing on my thought process. and its for school. so please dont hate me. are we cool? sweet. phew.

okay lets take a crack at this...

question: do I keep texting Joe Bob? (the question is something on the surface- the purpose is deeper)

purpose: to move on and no longer be emotionally attached to Joe Bob in any way.

point of view: single. 21 years old. female. mormon. senior at BYU. (these are all just simple demographics)

information: Joe Bob and I had been off and on for a year. we had officially ended things 2 months earlier. Joe Bob was hanging out with other girls. i was going out on multiple dates. 

inference: we are officially over. (this is "a step of the mind. and intellectual act by which someone concludes something is true.")

assumptions: there is no point in continuing to text an old boyfriend every day if there is no thought of dating. 

implication: we can't text anymore, so I should not respond.

concepts: breaking up means you dont talk anymore. boys dont want to date a girl who is emotionally involved with another boy. (things that we conceptualize...how is that for an explanation)

i will say something about the importance of timing. two months ago- ending communication was extremely hard and painful. i tried. but when I came to this conclusion this time- it just made sense. I was done. everyone has their own timing. what works for one person, might not work for another. If there is anything I have learned from talking to different friends in different relationships it is this. It is important to be understanding and supportive. You can offer them your two cents, and give them additional information- but they have to come to the decision on their own. Otherwise it wont work.

The end of my rant and lesson on thought process. until tomorrow.

dating advice from apartment 212 for the male gender.

this is what we do on monday nights.

1. Be yourself. Be confident. That's the most attractive thing you can do. 
2. Chew with your mouth closed. I can see what you are eating on your plate, I don't need to see it on your mouth too.
3. Don't over-think things. Keep it simple.
4. Avoid marathon first dates. Short and sweet. Keep them wanting more; you don't need to keep them out until midnight. 
5. You do not need to spend a lot of money on a first date. She just wants to get to know you and have fun. 
6. Half of you kiss too much. Half of you don't kiss enough. 
7. Don't lead a girl on. If you're not interested, don't hold her hand. 
8. Relax. Dating is supposed to be fun. 
9. Keep the inside of your car clean. We notice. 
10. Shave your face. No one likes kissing sandpaper. And you don't look like Hugh Jackman. 
11. Don't be a GIRL. That is our job. Stop over-analyzing; we do it enough for both genders. 
12. Stop watching R-rated movies. The prophet said no. No means no. I don't care if it's "just for violence". I want to know that you follow the prophet all the time, in every command. 
13. Don't run from the mission rules. That doesn't mean you have to listen to EFY music all the time, but be smart.
14. Be healthy. Stop eating fast food all the time. We like men better without clogged arteries. 
15. Be nice to my roommates. If we're not there, you can still talk to them. 
16. Stop sleeping/playing on your iPhone during church. 
17. Brush your teeth. You might even consider Crest Whitening Strips. Good smile=more kissing. 
18. Go to the temple. It's important; make time for it. 
19. Don't wait for a command in every situation. Take action; be decisive. If she doesn't like it, she'll stop you. But really, she's never going to stop you from taking her trash out. 
20. Don't waste your life watching TV or playing video games. 
21. Don't promise something you don't intend to follow through with. We remember what you promise. 
22. Let us know you're thinking about us. By small and simple things, are great things brought to pass. 
23. Don't sculpt your hair. If you spend more time getting ready than we do, that's bad. No girl is going to play with your sticky hair. But don't be a shag monster. 
24. No one likes talking to a brick wall. Use your words (not your profane words). And, you are capable of asking questions. No girl wants to carry a conversation by herself. 
25. Just because we're living in Provo, doesn't mean you need to rush things. Slow and steady wins the race

what spurred this list. well folks our stake had a questionnaire, was there an open ended question asking what we would say to boys? yes. did we sit and make a huge list? yes. this was the result.

yes, there are many personal anecdotes we could include to drive the points home, but that might be a little excessive.


side note: no individual people were thought of negatively during the creation of this list. We took from positive experiences. please do not feel attacked or offended. we love men. lots. and just want to share some great advice. and sometimes we are very honest. too honest. yay dating. go get 'em tiger.