Tuesday, March 13, 2012


Meet my newest night class. 

Night classes might be one of the worst things ever. Especially on days that you have no class. At the time that everyone is getting home from school you are heading out. "Why do I do this to myself?" Is a constant question as I make the trek back up to campus.

As awful as night classes are in theory, this night class is actually a heaven send. It is an integrity and character building class. I figured that I needed all the help I can get... well and it sounded amazing and was a one credit class, and I was in need of one more credit.

The class is full of controversy and discussion. Thoughts. Perplexing situations. and spending time with old friends. The beautiful Jackie Clark and the wonderful Spencer Schmutz are in my class. Both amazing people. I have found that much of what we are learning in that class parallels with what we have learned in my SFL 480 class (moral foundations of family life...take it!!!)

Well folks- I have some good news. (and by folks I mean, cathy  cate aka mom) We have a project for the class. We had three options. I chose the blog option.

You'll keep a daily journal of your observations of the day regarding integrity, honor, and character. Consider your own actions and those of others, and try to make small changes in your choices; show your growth through your journaling.  You will submit the journal (with 35 entries) and a 2-page reflection.  Your blogs must be original work, and not copied and pasted from other assignments.  You can also do just one entry per day; the intention is that this will take place over time.

So my musings on integrity, honor, and character will be here. I figure it is a perfect way to force me to blog/journal more and complete an assignment all at once.

so here i go.... day one.

have you ever thought about what all goes in to you making a decision. i am awful at making decisions. AWFUL. movie night with hot chocolate has become a common occurrence in our apartment- and I always make Alison decide. I hate dates where they make you decide what you want to do (that should be added to the list of dating advice). I always have so many conflicting thoughts going on in my mind that coming to a conclusion seems impossible. (I would like to point out that I DO make decisions, I just dont like unnecessary ones). well today in class we learned about the thought process that goes into making a decision.

i will enlighten you.

it all starts with the question. that this you are trying to solve. but dont forget there is purpose behind all decisions you are trying to make. a deeper purpose that you might share with people. 

we then have some influencing characteristics... this would include your point of view. these are external (well kind of internal) characteristics that affect your decision. example. gender, religion, profession, age, point in time, etc... we also have information. This is all you know about the decision you are making. Or the facts you are going off. But warning: you dont always have accurate or trustworthy information. sneaky information.

we next infer something about the situation based on the information we have. which leads to an assumption. and those assumptions have certain implications. now dont forget the underlying concepts we have during all of this. concepts= how we define certain things that impact our thought process.

is your head spinning yet?

simplified. 1. question. 2. purpose. 3. Point of View. 4. Information. 5. Inferences. 6. Assumptions. 7. Implications. 8. Concepts.

and there you have it. you have just experienced the elements of thought without ever realizing you thought them.

okay so now a personal experience to try to drive it home.

background. dated boy. ended things with boy. stayed in contact with boy. as bill and cate say "Ellie, you dont know how to break up with a boy." kind of true. well i am proud to say I am finally trying to break my vicious cycle and move on... now how did we get to this decision. 

*names have been change to protect privacy. ooo thats just fun to say. we will call said boy "Joe Bob" heheh. 

P.S. I apologize to the third party if you are reading this. This is purely focusing on my thought process. and its for school. so please dont hate me. are we cool? sweet. phew.

okay lets take a crack at this...

question: do I keep texting Joe Bob? (the question is something on the surface- the purpose is deeper)

purpose: to move on and no longer be emotionally attached to Joe Bob in any way.

point of view: single. 21 years old. female. mormon. senior at BYU. (these are all just simple demographics)

information: Joe Bob and I had been off and on for a year. we had officially ended things 2 months earlier. Joe Bob was hanging out with other girls. i was going out on multiple dates. 

inference: we are officially over. (this is "a step of the mind. and intellectual act by which someone concludes something is true.")

assumptions: there is no point in continuing to text an old boyfriend every day if there is no thought of dating. 

implication: we can't text anymore, so I should not respond.

concepts: breaking up means you dont talk anymore. boys dont want to date a girl who is emotionally involved with another boy. (things that we conceptualize...how is that for an explanation)

i will say something about the importance of timing. two months ago- ending communication was extremely hard and painful. i tried. but when I came to this conclusion this time- it just made sense. I was done. everyone has their own timing. what works for one person, might not work for another. If there is anything I have learned from talking to different friends in different relationships it is this. It is important to be understanding and supportive. You can offer them your two cents, and give them additional information- but they have to come to the decision on their own. Otherwise it wont work.

The end of my rant and lesson on thought process. until tomorrow.

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